Meeting People

Do you ever wonder why some people come into your life?

Like why DO certain people come into our lives? I know that some come for a season or a reason, or whatever, but it’s always a mystery to me.

Maybe you meet someone who you really need to help you over something, or to guide you or give you advice. Maybe it’s someone to show you how you need to improve your life choices. Or maybe you are there for them.

And what happens when you meet someone and you know what they can’t be in your life, but everything is pulling you towards them? Even when you try your hardest to keep things clear and where they need to be. But we are human so things never actually go the way that we want them to. We aren’t really in control of every aspect of our lives, even if we want to be.

So what do you do when that happens? Maybe you met a person and it’s for them to teach you something about yourself, or maybe you are there for them. To help them value themselves more or have some sort of realization? Maybe they just really needed a friend at the moment and you are there to comfort them and believe in them? But with those moments, there is always a level of attachment.

But what happens when your purpose in that person’s life is either over or unclear? And just where do all those emotions go? Like sure you want it to go in a certain place but you know it never will, or can’t, for any one of a thousand reasons, but there is still that want there. There is still that longing to have your own way, to try to make excuses and exceptions to things that you know are true and won’t change.

What happens then? Do you just face the inevitable or do you just let it all go and say you’re going to do what you want despite of what the universe is trying to tell you. Do you play the rational mind and just accept that sometimes you were never meant to hold a long-term place in someone’s life, or them in yours?

My mind is constantly struggling with this. I’m such an easily attached person. I can meet someone off a social media site (since I have so many) and have an instant connection to them and it’s hurt me so many times. But I never learn. I never take my own warnings to heart. I care for people I have never met in life, people who are so different from myself, just after a short conversation. I get so attached and I want to continue to be part of their lives. And some people from those sites have become great friends, some more than friends, some are there for me to go to whenever I need a helping hand or some sound advice and then they disappear for a while. But unless someone has wronged me in such a way that I no longer want to talk to them, it’s hard for me to just walk away. It doesn’t matter the gender, or the nature of the relationship, it’s always been that way for me.

This past week I have been struggling with this so much. I know what eventually needs to happen and what the inevitable is going to be. But I hate to accept it within my own self, and I know they are having the same struggles. I know they are wanting it to be different just as much as I am, but it can’t be. And we’ve talked about that. So it’s this constant tug of war as we try to navigate things. Which is causing a lot of introspection and this serious post.

I just wish there was a way to just switch on the level of emotions you want to put into something, or people would come with a light or a number or something that would tell you how to program your own emotions to connect with the other people.

Being a living, breathing, emotional person sucks sometimes.

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