More Roommate Insanity

Hopefully this is the last one for a little while.

This week has been insane with the roommate. You can read part one of this drama here, and then part two here. Part two was written right before leaving for church yesterday morning as it happened Saturday night and into Sunday morning.

So I get home from church yesterday around 12:30, like I normally do and the first thing I do is head to my room to get outta my awesome heels which hurt my feet but make me feel amazing because I love them and can bounce while I walk and I feel like Tyra Banks.

tyra banks nbc GIF by America's Got Talent
Seriously I walk down the street like this, just try and stop me!

Anyway, so my awesome heels come off and I turn around to put them onto the shoe rack that I have in my room and there is a piece of paper on the floor. So I pick it up and it is FULL, front and back! And it’s kind of messy writing and I’m trying to read it and it’s this huge long thing that my roommate wrote while I was out on my date with Jesus – which I really needed today y’all. Like I was angry and upset and I wasn’t really listening but what I heard I really needed to hear. Some life changes gonna be happening.

Back to this paper, so to boil it all down, his main concern is sleep. And that he’s being sleep deprived and like in the other two posts about this, you know he refuses to get ear plugs or whatever. But I understand the sleep deprivation thing. I get it. And sure, lately I’ve been going to bed early (like 9pm like the little old granny that I am becoming) and waking up at 2 or 3 to go to the bathroom but like I’ve been QUIET. Once he brought up the noise from the door, I’ve been trying super hard to avoid the noise.

So basically he just wants to get it so that he is sleeping from 11-6 without any interuptions which is honestly impossible because we live under the loudest toddler of life who just gets to cry for an hour in the middle of the night but whatever. I can usually sleep through it and if I can’t, I throw in my ear plugs and roll over and go back to sleep. It’s not that big of a deal.

But this paper is all about sleeping from 11 pm -6 am. And I’m sorry but even when I wasn’t exhausted from working with 50 little adorable monsters, I’d still be in bed by like 10/10:30. That’s just normal for me. Getting up in the middle of the night every night is definitely NOT normal for me and I’m seriously hating on it.

So I took this paper out to the kitchen and I was like “what are some of these words?” and he was all agitated and bouncing around the kitchen saying I was interrupting his breakfast and he just stood over me while I read it. By this time, I was calm. Like I was still upset with him but I was calmer than at 7 am. I tried to keep my voice at a quiet level and speak with purpose and in a calm way. I know that when someone is angry with me, I don’t hear what they are saying at all. I just react with emotions. So I tried to keep that in mind while dealing with him.

So once I got to a point where I had read the whole thing, and understood what he was talking about, I calmly asked a few questions and was actually able to get out what I was trying to say earlier that morning, which is just that if the kitchen door is closed then let it be closed for like an hour and then you can open it. It’s not a big deal. I don’t hear him doing his stuff after I go to sleep anyway, at least I haven’t been hearing it so it’s all good. And that I’ve been trying really hard to make sure I don’t do anything that will wake him up.

But his sleep is still being interrupted when I get up. Like he said even when I don’t close the door all the way, I’m still waking him up (he thinks maybe the flushing or the taps or whatever), or it’s the upstairs people. And like I hate waking up in the middle of the night too, so I’ve been trying to correct my sleeping just for my own sake, not even for his.

We spent like over half an hour, probably closer to forty-five minutes talking. Only the first half was about our stuff. Other than the sleep issue though, like we’re good. It’s working other than that and him being a jerk over text. Which he admitted today he sucks at texting and if he’s brash in person (he is) then he’s ten times worse over text (he is).

But the thing that got me is how adamant he is about being “neighbours” like he has no interest what so ever in having even the simplest of connection between the people he lives with. He’s totally happy if all we say is “hi” when we see each other. He keeps comparing it to the relationship he has with the people in the house next door or the ones across the street. That even though we occupy the same apartment, we are the same as the people across the street. He just said that he’s already normally not a social person and about a week or two ago he was actually crying as he passed by me in the kitchen and said he had a “life altering family tragedy” which is making him less interactive. Guess I’m just getting the brunt of that because we “are neighbours” lol

So I still think he’s insane and that there’s got to be something there that’s the cause of all of this, but at least I no longer feel like I have to stay in my room or risk running into him out in the kitchen or hallway.

Hope all that made sense!

Bottom line: we talked it out, I still think he’s insane, can’t wait until my lease is over because I can’t afford to move just yet anyway….

26 thoughts on “More Roommate Insanity

  1. I agree… Possibly on the spectrum. If I were more qualified, I might diagnose him with a personality disorder or two. That’s just crazy to me that he can’t view you as anything more than a neighbor. Look, I’m not the most social person in the world, but if I’m living in the same place with someone, I’m gonna take time to treat them like any decent human being should. Other people that live in my building? I couldn’t tell you a single one of their names. I met a guy in the elevator the other night and all I did was talk about his dog (whose name is Maggie). Can’t get the human’s name, but the dog I got.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Haha!! No he wouldn’t even do that with you, like he said the one neighbour beside us is the best he’s ever had. He knows his name and that’s it. They just say hey and nothing else.

      But I totally agree with you, how can you live with someone and not make even the smallest connection? It’s so awkward to just be there and not be pleasant

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I think it’s funny how reading a letter means that you are “hearing everything.” You got a little voice inside your head too? 😆

    His letter is definitely passive aggressive. Sadly, I dealt with a similar issue with previous roommates. They would subtly leave letters around the house, like by the thermostat for instance. At least he was willing to talk about it, but still, he’s a grumpy old man! 😂🤣

    Liked by 1 person

    • 😂 little bit! But aside from the crazy, he’s not too bad to have in the same space. He’s clean and (somewhat) respectful, and once I yelled at him Sunday morning and he had our talk Sunday after church he seems to be back to the Personality of when I moved in lol

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I had to live with a bunch of girls for 4.5 years of college. We never got this bad. This is exactly why I had to have a place to myself. You’re also paying for the apartment and you shouldn’t feel the need to hide in your room.

    Also his idea is unrealistic unless he’s going to buy some ear plugs. Even if you were quiet and didn’t disturb him, the toddler would STILL be waking him up. Like… HOW RUDE of you to go empty your bladder at 2am. You can’t really help bodily functions. We can’t all be Sheldon Cooper.

    Liked by 1 person

    • HAHA! I know I find it a little ridiculous as well for him to complain about it, but on the other hand, it’s frustrating for me to have to get up too. So I’m trying to adjust my own sleeping schedule to fit my life better and to stop the getting up every night. Like for me. Not for him. But I also do feel bad if I’m the cause of him always waking up. But ALSO dude get some ear plugs lol

      Unfortunately I can’t afford to live by myself just yet. There was that amazing place I saw back in March which would have been just sharing a kitchen with another girl (bedroom/bathroom/living room all mine) and she was a teacher too so she would get the exhaustion haha! But I didn’t think I could afford it on my budget but I think I could have made it work. I’ll look again in the spring for a better place

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I feel like someone with those ‘needs’ should be incredibly explicit when looking for a roommate. And if he’s the one with the lease overall, he should be the one oiling the door and whatnot. And… everyone wears earplugs, get over it

    Liked by 1 person

  5. If the door is sticking you can try rubbing it with a cake of soap (the door and frame where they stick). It will make them slide more easily. And an option for pipes (apart from the flush) is to have some anti-bacterial handwash pump available so you don’t have to wash in water. I know that’s you tkaing on the solution, but if it makes life easier for the next 10 months…


    • I’ve just given up feeling bad about it. At first I felt bad for him but if one flush at 3am keeps him up for the rest of the night and he refused to do anything himself to avoid it, that’s not my problem. I’m tired of him talking to me. At any time. No wonder no one stays longer than they have to


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