Isn’t that the rule for getting over someone?
I’ve heard it said a few times, that when you want to get over someone, you need to give yourself one week for every month you’ve been together. Over the course of my life, I’ve always found that this was a bit of an exaggeration, and never really thought that someone would need such an amount of time to get over another person.
Until this fall.
And now I totally get it.
Or maybe I don’t? All I know is that it’s been just over two months now since I ended something that was really significant to me (that the feelings involved were about 8-months worth) and it’s now starting to get better. I’m actually ok now. Or it could be that I told myself that I wasn’t going to date at all in December, not even entertain the thought of guys at all in December, and now it’s getting to the end of December and I’m all “ok, I’m over this dateless month and I’m ready to get back out there.” Maybe it’s a combination of the two? I’m not really sure. All I know is that I’m happy to not be overly sad anymore when recalling memories of that person. That I can actually have a conversation about something they said or did and not have to spend the rest of the day with a sad little cloud over my head as I think about them and miss them.
But there ya have it – my own experience has finally proved that saying to be true. And I am actually kind of glad that my dateless month is over. Maybe it’s a little bit of combination with the start of the new year and all the new things I have planned for 2019.
Hows about you? Have you ever heard of the “one week for every month” rule? Or do you have another rule based on your own experiences on how long it takes to get over someone? Lemme know in the comments below.
No Love for Fatties 
I’ve heard half of the time of the relationship. But I think realistically it takes as long as it takes you. If it was a shorter relationship, then yeah, it probably won’t take too long to get over them, but I think it takes longer if the relationship was more long-term commitment. My ex and I dated for ~16 months, and it took me like six months to get over him. But I agree with you, that it’s nice to be able to talk about someone and not really feel anything anymore. It’s a relief on you, and you don’t have to have them taking up that room in your brain or your heart anymore.
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Oh goodness half the time? What if you were married to someone for like 10 years and then got divorced? Are you not gonna be over them for 5 years? 😐
I agree that it just takes you as long as it takes you and for a longer relationship it’s gonna take you longer.
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For some reason I always think of it as like dating relationships and not marriages. I guess that wouldn’t apply in the case you were married. If I was better at math, I’d try to figure out the one week for every month of a 10 year marriage haha.
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Lol good point with the dating vs marriage! Annnnd math: 10 years is 120 months (right? 12 months per year times 10 years?) soooo 120 weeks? That’s still like 30 months? Am I totally wrong on the math? I feel like that’s wrong…(12 weeks is 3 months times 10 to get to 120? Lol OMG I’m a licensed teacher I should be able to do this without guessing but whatever I’m not checking any of this) sooooo like 2.5 years?
Omg so I get all the way down here and realize that 1 week per month is 1/4 so obviously it’s 2.5 outta 10. That would have been so much easier I feel so dumb lol
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Hahaha this took an interesting turn. 2.5 years sounds good to me. I’m horrible at math.
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Haha I’m horrible at math too!
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I was with my ex for 4 1/2 years and at 13 months after, I’m nowhere close to over it or ready to see anyone. I don’t think that there is an equation for moving on, unfortunate
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Awww!! Hopefully you’ll get to that place soon. I know it doesn’t work for everyone, but I started to feel better after going on a few dates with someone. It was a month after and I thought I was ready. I half was but half not. Even so, it was a good step to getting to where I am now.
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I’m sorry you are dealing with this but I’m glad dateless month is almost over. I don’t envy single people. It looks so hard out there. I think I would just entertain a mail order groom or something. Does that exist?
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HAHA! I’m not sure if a mail order groom exists? Brides do so I’m sure there has to be a groom option as well? But I’m totally fine with waiting for my guy. Like sometimes it does suck but that’s ok. And yes, it’s a good thing the month is almost over! I’ve had some good time to focus on myself and then to do some solid reflecting which is always good!
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You’re such a positive person! Don’t ever loose that! And if there isn’t a mail order groom, I think we just found the next untapped niche!
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Aww thanks lovely! 🥰 I’ll try to keep it!!
And yyyaasss gurl!! Let’s start a business hehe
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I was with my ex for 8 years and (I’m not proud of this) started into my relationship with my now husband just weeks after. But to be honest, the relationship with my ex was over way before we called it quits. It still took me quite some time to get over him, but Fella was very understanding about it.
All this to say is that it’s personal and situational is all.
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Oh yes definitely a very personal and situation based thing! But at least you found your fella after!! 😊😊
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Good to know you got there, or are at least getting there.
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I’d say it’s a “I got there” 🙂 I think that with specific relationships (any relationship: friendships/romantic whatever) there are some feelings that will just always be there after it ends. It’s not a bad thing that some people will always have a place in your memories, but I’ve healed and mended and I’m in a good place 😊
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I’ve always heard it takes half the time you spent in the relationship. 8 months of being all in your feels with this person, I would say around 4 months to be completely done and over it. It seems like it averages out to be about the same as your rule though.
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Half the time seems reasonable. Maybe when I get to the four months I’ll be *toally* over him? Lol I’ll have to try to check in with my feelings in another two months haha! But at least right now I’ve reached a good place that I’m happy with and feel like I’ve got a good handle on getting over him.
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