I’ve finally run out of things from the Thanksgiving weekend to write about (goodness it’s only taken me ten days!) but this post does carry through from the last few posts.
A few days ago, I wrote about getting my grandmother’s dishes, which led me to write about ghosts and how on Sunday the sermon at church spoke on them as well. Now, this post is a continuation from church on Sunday.
A little background, a few weeks ago, as I was travelling on the bus to church, I saw this guy get on. He was carrying a Bible and had a really bad limp but that’s no big deal, it’s just needed for this post. So we both got off at the same stop, and after I was settled into my chair and getting all set up for the service (phone off, a pen where I could reach it, Bible not at the bottom of my bag etc) I noticed him take a seat a few rows up. Everyone seemed to know him, asking him how he was doing and stuff.
This week, I saw him again on the bus. We got off at the same stop again, but I’m the type of shy person who can’t just walk up to a random stranger and be all “Oh hey, we go to the same church, what’s up?!” I need an introduction first.
After the worship time, we always have a few minutes to greet others around us, and on Sunday he was sitting in a place where we actually shook hands and said good morning. Leaving the church, it was kind of drizzling. It wasn’t very pleasant – but being the “always prepared” nanny that I am with a never-ending supply of things in my bag, I had an umbrella at the ready! I was casually making my way to the bus stop, staying dry when I noticed him limping sans-umbrella in front of me.
I picked up the pace, and we ended up crossing the street at the same time. I walked up beside him, said “hey, are you going to the bus? Want to share my umbrella?” Because now we at least had acknowledged one another at church so it wasn’t just a weirdo being all “hey come hang out under my umbrella”. He was super sweet and even took the umbrella from me to hold it over both of us. Male readers, take note! Major brownie points for the one!! Don’t let chivalry die.
Anyways, so I literally still have no idea who this guy is or what his deal is so we start to talk. I ask how long he’s been going to the church and he says for a while, he used to be in the choir/praise team but had moved away for a little bit, with his girlfriend. Now that’s easy enough information to pass along. BUT THEN he starts telling me how he wasn’t in a sexual relationship with her, why they broke up, and all that and dude I still don’t even know your name!
And he made a point of repeating that sexual relationship fact a few times.
Now, I’ve been out of the “I’m only going to date Christians and no one else” game for a long time, and I understand that waiting until marriage is an important part of that game (I follow that rule myself), but have I been out of the “Christians only” box for so long that this is what is expected? For you to give a full sexual history right up front?
Let me set this a little bit more straight: in no way was my offering him my umbrella an invitation for a date, or a gesture with the anticipation of being asked out, or a way for me to tell him I was single and looking for a date. I did not bat my eyes, or flip my hair, or make any notions of flirting his way. NONE OF THAT. Just me feeling bad because he was getting rained on and we were literally going to the exact same bus stop. It would have been hella rude of me if I didn’t offer my umbrella. I’m a Canadian – I can’t live with that kind of guilt.
So Christian men, if you are out there and are reading, is this the new thing? Lay it alllll out up front? Or did I just happen to come across a very open and honest guy who shares? Which is fine, of course, I was a little shocked at the amount of information he was sharing. But maybe I just have one of those faces/personalities that make people feel super safe and comfortable in sharing details with me?