The Day I Thought My Brother Died

For those who are regular followers of this here bit of insanity, you will know that my brother and I have a very sarcastic relationship. For those of you who have yet to discover this fact, buckle up, ya’ll are in for an education. 

When I say that my brother is my best friend, I’m not being all sisterly and loving and wanting people to go “aww that’s so sweet”. It’s the truth. There is BFF-R, and then there is Le Brother. And both are my bestest. I literally can not go through an entire day without speaking to either of them. They make my world ok.

So on Friday, Le Brother and I got into a little bit of a disagreement via text. He lives in Ottawa so we just text every day. We repaired our little tiff before going to bed. I knew he was going to check out a second-hand bike on Saturday. But I didn’t hear from him at all on Saturday. Even after I sent him a message.

Then on Sunday, I sent a message early in the morning to catch him before church. Mostly because I had arrived at this new church I’ve been going to super duper early and had no one to talk to. Still no reply.

After church service, no reply. Sometimes, Le Brother just ignores my texts if they are something silly – which I’m sure you can guess they almost always are. But to go for over 24 hours without a reply to anything? Even after he went bike shopping? I was starting to get concerned. So, I did what any self-respecting sister would do, I pestered him into submission! Sending random texts for the majority of the afternoon waiting for the eventual “OMG SHUT UP ALREADY” which I knew was bound to happen if I kept it up enough.

Here is photographic proof of how well I executed this plan. Please remember that this is half my regular self, and half my “let’s see how annoying I can get before he explodes” self. Which is practically my normal self with him anyways. Let me be clear: I am not like this with other people. Just Le Brother.

please ignore all the spelling mistakes. I don’t care to spell check while texting him. 

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Now as you can see, by 1 pm I am really starting to get worried. I was meeting Bff-R for an afternoon of movies and dinner to celebrate my birthday, and she told me that his phone was probably dead. Knowing my brother, I didn’t think that was possible. And also, here in Ontario, a few years ago we had this huge case where a guy went on Kijiji (like Craig’s list) to sell his truck. He met up with buyers who wanted a test drive and then they killed him. So I was FREAKING OUT INSIDE. Our movie started (which was AMAZING BTW) and I had decided that if I didn’t get a response by the time the movie was over, I was going to message his roommate.

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FINALLY!!! 20 minutes after the start of the movie he replies. I can see the alert light flashing in my purse so I was pretty sure it was from him. Bff-R was correct after all, his phone had died and he left it at home. Over-reacting for nothing.

Then he went back out to actually buy his new bike later that evening and we had this lovely bit of conversation:

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Notice how he just bypasses my question? What a brother! We generally do that to each other. Just skip over things we don’t want to talk about. Sibling love at it’s finest right there.

But a little back story: I want to name EVERYTHING pancakes. He once bought an albino fish for his fish tank so I would know which one was mine, and I named him pancakes. And he lived for 2 whole days because his fellow fish wouldn’t let him school with them because he was albino and they weren’t – and then he just died. It was so sad. So now everything is pancakes.

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Gah, I love my brother! And I am glad that he wasn’t kidnapped and killed.

For those waiting for my nail post, it’s coming! I promise!! It’s just taking much longer than I was expecting to get everything ready for it – but I’m trying! Whatever happens, it will be up by tonight.

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